Dear me, thank you. ♥️

Dear me, 

I don't think I ever thought I'd write to you; I'm probably still young to even write this. But here I am, regardless. I think maybe I need to, because I don't talk to you anymore, I don't tell you things, I don't let you be comfortable and most importantly, I haven't apologized to you. 

For most of my life, I've been so uncomfortable with you. I didn't accept parts of you and your flaws or your looks. I kept thinking how perfect you have to be in order to be likeable. You have been tall and loud most of your life - also weird at times. You weren't confident with yourself, doubted yourself and hated your body for reasons that never mattered, for flaws that aren't flaws, and for all of that and more, I'm sorry. I'm sorry you thought you had to fit in with people and had to have the 'perfect' body just because. I'm sorry you cried to yourself at night and felt left out with most people you met, every friend you made. 

I'm sorry I didn't make you comfortable at times you needed it and forced you to find comfort in alone, in loneliness. I'm sorry you looked in the mirror and wondered why you have flabby arms, love handles and double chin instead of accepting them and I'm sorry I made you think you needed to be flawless for boys to want you. That's not true, it never was, I hope you know that now. 

You were never any of the things I made you think. You were never loud and weird, you were never hated by anyone, you were never not perfect, you have always supported me and been there for me. You have picked me up and dressed me pretty. You have smiled at my mistakes and told me it's okay to make some; we're humans. If we don't make mistakes, who will? You reminded me to stop seeking external validation and to be myself, those who want me, will tell me. You told me to be kind and gentle with myself and be the same with my friends and family. You're the only one in my life who's taken her time to accept me exactly the way I am and have loved me for it throughout. 

I'm here today to say that I love you too. I loved you when you weren't confident about yourself and I love you today, when you completely are. I loved you when you cried to yourself everyday and I loved you when you wiped the same tears, moved on and became someone stronger and happier. 

Thank you for everything you've done, I love you with all my heart and soul. ♥️

                                                                                                                                               From,

                                                                                                                                                        Me.